Preparation paralyzed people-pleaser blames others

do_not_give_upI hate taking a dose of my own medicine. Let me just say, this week I felt your pain as a sales professional. I spent hours preparing a webinar for Team Leaders and OP’s, and hours rehearsing to make it perfect. I’m expanding The Flyer Box Club and that requires me to sell the concept to Market Centers around the country. Eight (yes, 8) people actually showed up to my webinar and I haven’t closed anyone yet. Sighs and screams….

If an agent came into my office and said “I tried this one thing, one time, and 3 days later I still haven’t closed on a house,” I would laugh them out of my office. I would tell them to stop whining and go do it 10 more times. Having to look in the mirror and tell myself that this week was gut-wrenching.

This week I thought I would share my process and lessons, perhaps you’ll relate. When I’m trying to push through to the next level and I don’t get the results I’m hoping for, here’s what I do….

1) I go external. I try to find someone else to fix it for me. I’ll think to myself… “maybe I’ll hire someone to do this or that, maybe this person or that person can help me with this project.” Or better yet….”it’s all _____’s fault!”

2) I go into preparation paralysis. Maybe if I just create another brochure / video / presentation, then that will make all the difference.

3) I go out of scope in order to please someone that I don’t need to please. I start saying things like, “sure, I can do that too,” even though it isn’t necessary – nor does it make strategic sense to do so.

Needless to say, those 3 immediate reactions are WRONG!

After the initial freak-out wanes then I begin to hear my rational thoughts. This was my counsel to myself this week and my counsel to you at every individual meeting, team meeting and email I send you….get yourself a plan, keep at it, do not stop (see picture above).

First of all, I can’t remember a time that a satisfactory, permanent solution came from an outside source. Other people can help, they can motivate, they can listen to me, but in my experience, they’ve never actually fixed it for me. Does it make me uncomfortable to do things that I don’t like or feel like I’m not so good at? Hell yes. I hate selling – and I especially hate selling myself. It’s even painful for me to send these emails to you! But it has to get done. It doesn’t seem to bother my competitors to talk to “my” audience.

All this talk around KW about drip campaigns and follow-up and 8×8’s and 33-touches – it’s all true. I’ve seen it hundreds of times with my own endeavors and when I’m helping agents with their campaigns. Over and over again, it works. Instead of asking for marriage on the first date, I have to warm up the audience. Flirt with them a little bit and ask them on dates. Get to know them and give them a chance to know me. Get them to do little things and then I’ll ask them for a long term commitment later. That’s what strategic campaigns are all about.

And finally, another brochure or video or whatever is – those are just excuses to keep me from doing what I know I actually need to do. I have the tools in hand (more than enough actually) – I just need to go use them. The hammer does no good if it stays in the toolbox, buying another hammer doesn’t help either.

I sometimes forget that when I first started my business, there were a lot of days that I was sitting in the lobby at the Southwest Market Center shooting the breeze with Judy who works the front desk, twiddling my thumbs, secretly freaking out, and not sure this whole thing would work out. But then my rational and strategic actions lead to results and things are much different now.

Don’t you stop. I won’t either.